Skunks aren't so adorable when they've taken up residence under our decks and porches, are they. We don't want to irritate them, as the consequences can be unspeakable but we really do want them to leave. Rest easy, because we've brought helpful advice.

First, get rid of any pet food outside, and lock up that trash and garbage. All that spells "smorgasbord" in skunk. Next, they enjoy eating grubs, so eradicate grubs and the like from gardens. Also, when they are out doing whatever it is that skunks do, fill their dens with straw and dirt. And finally, even though they are wearing their fancy dress outfits, they aren't really party animals. Leave a radio on low, and they'll abandon your turf.

So, we need to get rid of skunks at the bridge table also, and we can do that by being stars.