Your Pard hasn't been too happy with you lately? In fact, he's been heard muttering, "I'm going to KILL that screwball!" To help you, here's a quick review of the most common poisons.

Belladonna, brewed from plants, was used as a cosmetic in the Middle Ages. It causes an especially painful death. It was used by Roman Emperors, various serial killers, and legend has it by Macbeth. It has a bitter-sweet taste, easily disguised by sugar.

Another old stand-by is of course Arsenic. Some famous victims include Napoleon, King George III and Simone Bolivar. If you smell almonds, for heaven's sake, don't drink it!

And the worst is Strychnine because there's no antidote. Another serial killer, Dr. Thomas Neil Cream killed dozens with it. Amazingly (considering the consequences!) Strychnine is added in a diluted form to some street drugs because it is mildly hallucinogenic. Further diluted, it has been used as a performance enhancer for athletes. It is bitter, bitter, bitter, so don't say you haven't been warned!

Maybe if we brush up on our bidding, Pard won't be so upset with us, and we can drink the water.

We continue our adventures in balancing today. Just a quick review: When you are in the pass-out seat, you hold the power. A pass by you ends the auction and it seems the points are somewhat evenly divided around the table.

Your choices are: Pass. You know how we feel about that, but sometimes Pass is the best bid you can make. Next, you can overcall. This generally promises a five-card suit, and usually a Darn Good suit. Finally, we can Double. This generally shows shortness in the opponents' suit, four-ish cards in any unbid major, and tolerance for any suit. No doubletons!

Let's see if we can manage to survive.